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Being a parent is H.A.R.D. I looked for my manual that came with my 2 girls and I couldn’t find it, so I am back to just doing my best;). 

 I read a book called the Tolec Wisdom of 4 Agreements. They say if you live by these four things that you will have a peaceful and joyful life. Since deep diving and reading it multiple times and trying to be aware as I go through my days as much as I can, you know what? The book is on to something.  So here they are, the four agreements:

  1. Be impeccable with your word: Do not gossip, do not speak poorly on yourself or others, only say yes to what you can commit to, and use your words for support, not as swords.
  2. Don’t take anything personally: Really, 99% of the time people’s reactions have very little to do with us, and mostly what is going on in their life. Don’t make yourself the victim…just move on with grace and support. 
  3. Don’t assume: Well that is kind of self-explanatory, but, they say we often create stories in our minds of what “WE” think or perceive and it causes undue stress, anxiety, and worry.  The fix? Just be courageous and ask the question, clarify the answer and communicate courageously.
  4. Always do your Best: When you always do your best you can live wholeheartedly.  Remember, your best will be different in different seasons of life so when there is a change go back to agreement #1 and only commit to what you can and only speak lovingly of yourself and to yourself. 

Here is the whole point of this letter though…. Our kids don’t learn by what we say….they learn by what we DO. When we as parents judge ourselves, they learn to judge themselves. When we assume and create anxiety, they learn to assume and it creates anxiety, when we take things personally, they too go through their day at school and do the same. But when they see you do your best, speak words of love and acceptance over yourself, support others in life, and have the courage to have the tough conversations they will be learning far more from what you DO than what you tell them to do. 

Your best will be different in different seasons of life, so today, go on with your bad self, give yourself grace and realize…you have done your best.